Sister Shivani, a Brahmkumari, and one of the most famous spiritual orators and teachers, has always been an inspiration to people. With her talks, speeches, and even the little conversations, she has motivated people and changed them to be a better version of themselves A version that is less stressed, more at peace with itself, and of course, in sync with the divine.
And off late, a particular video of Sister Shivani is doing rounds on the internet where she tells people about the importance of forgiving others and the harm un-forgiveness brings.
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She shares how she believes that holding onto grudges or past hurts is like carrying unnecessary baggage, and with time, it weighs down the mind and soul of the person.
What really is forgiveness?
Forgiveness is not just about saying sorry or about forgetting a certain act, but it is actually a process of healing yourself. This forgiveness could be for a parent who you thought were not enough when you were a child, or it could be for yourself for the situations you still feel you could have done better in.
By forgiving, we can let go of the negative energy that is trapped within us, and this allows some space to clear up for peace, love, and happiness.
The mental load
In the talk Sister Shivani was giving, she briefly explained how not forgiving someone can affect our mental and emotional health. And even in reality, when we think too much about someone’s actions and how it wronges us, it feels like a heavy bag that is on our shoulders and we are carrying it around for days. Over time, this burden becomes exhausting, and starts to affect our thoughts, relationships, and even our mental health.
She also pointed out that when we refuse to forgive, we allow the actions of others to occupy our mind, which in turn leads to overthinking as we replay the hurtful incident in our head, questioning motives, and imagining scenarios. This overthinking, in turn, creates stress and anxiety.
Her teachings
A major part of Sister Shivani’s teachings is about being mindful, having faith, and about letting go of what does not benefit us and is good for us. She talks about how we should be aware of our thoughts as these thoughts shape us, our actions, and our future realities.
For example, Sister Shivani regularly advises people to take a few moments everyday for themselves. These could be just before you go to bed or even when you are drinking a glass of water! A few affirmations and a ton of mental declutter can do good for people in the long term.
How to let go?
Letting go is not easy and does not come naturally to everyone. While some believe in the philosophy of ‘New day, new approach to life’, others get stuck on what happened yesterday, how terrible and unfair it was, and then begin a spiral of overthinking.
And thus, to stop these thoughts from clouding your mind, Sister Shivani says that one should say some simple phrases before going to bed. She explains that even though it was another person that did something wrong, it is us who do ourselves the most wrong by thinking about it time and again. And thus, Sister Shivani says that if you really want to forgive someone and put yourself to ease, there is one thing you should say for one week before going to bed. The phrase she said was ‘Past is past. I release you, I forgive, and I let go’.
This is like the perfect phrase to help people let go off the excess thoughts and feelings that could be clouding their minds and can help release the unwanted thoughts or the actions that someone else did which are affecting us day and again.